2nd Sunday of Lent

Marriage Catechesis – Part 5

       Many of you may remember the school yard rhyme: “First comes Love, then comes Marriage, then comes _______ pushing a baby carriage.” While not all married couples have children, marriage, by its nature, is open to life as one of its great ends & purposes. 

       CCC 2366 Fecundity is a gift, an end of marriage, for conjugal love naturally tends to be fruitful. A child does not come from outside as something added on to the mutual love of the spouses, but springs from the very heart of that mutual giving, as its fruit and fulfillment. So the Church, which "is on the side of life" teaches that "each and every marriage act must remain open 'per se' to the transmission of life." "This particular doctrine, expounded on numerous occasions by the Magisterium, is based on the inseparable connection, established by God, which man on his own initiative may not break, between the unitive significance and the procreative significance which are both inherent to the marriage act."

      2368 A particular aspect of this responsibility concerns the regulation of procreation. For just reasons, spouses may wish to space the births of their children. It is their duty to make certain that their desire is not motivated by selfishness but is in conformity with the generosity appropriate to responsible parenthood.

      Most often, the morally acceptable manner of ‘spacing births’ is a form of Fertility Awareness Methodology, often referred to as Natural Family Planning. This could be the Creighton Model, Billings Method, or some others that utilize the natural cycle & symptoms of the woman’s body to determine fruitfulness in advance of marital intimacy. Among the benefits of NFP, when adopted as a mindset as much as a methodology, is the strengthening of shared marital responsibilities & communication. NFP couples have a vastly reduced divorce rate. There are no adverse side-effects or environmental impacts from NFP. NFP has been known to help surface other health issues. Most importantly, it aligns with God's plan for the nature of our human bodies. More could be said. Interestingly, NFP use has been growing in recent years, but not by the Christians who largely developed this medical science. It is being embraced by couples interested in an organic & hormone free lifestyle. When we live in a manner agreeable to God’s plan, it equally aligns with what is healthy for people and the planet!

      Sadly, many married couples who desire the good & wonderful gift of a child will struggle. It is a well-known & well-documented reality that infertility is on the rise among couples. There are many causes for this, use of artificial forms of contraceptives early in life, delaying the age when one attempts to conceive, environmental causes, lifestyle factors, and others. And yet, the struggle is certainly not a new one. Abram & Sarai struggled to conceive their long awaited Isaac. The Church compassionately acknowledges & accompanies such couples. 

        2374 Couples who discover that they are sterile [or struggle with infertility] suffer greatly.

        2375 Research aimed at reducing human sterility is to be encouraged…

Although a couple’s desire for a child is true, good, & beautiful, how that child comes into the world matters. 

        2376 Techniques that entail the dissociation of husband and wife, by the intrusion of a person other than the couple (donation of sperm or ovum, surrogate uterus), are gravely immoral. These techniques (heterologous artificial insemination and fertilization) infringe the child's right to be born of a father and mother known to him and bound to each other by marriage…

      Gravely immoral implies that it is an always & everywhere prohibited act for all Catholics. In Vitro Fertilization (IVF), not only violates the sanctity of the marital act between the husband & wife by introducing third party medical personnel into the actual act of conception, it often invites third party donors thus violating the sanctity of husband & wife. The IVF process is also a highly abortive technology. Numerous fertilized eggs (i.e., real living babies) are conceived in a lab only to be discarded, as the most viable are reintroduced into the mother for implantation. Even then, subsequent abortions can be required to reduce the number of babies that ‘took’ or implanted for a ‘manageable’ pregnancy. While it is easy to understand the deep desire for a child and the immense ache of longing parents. We must always remember “A child is not something owed to one, but is a gift. The "supreme gift of marriage" is a human person” (CCC 2378).

Nothing Less than saints for the Holy Family of God.

Holy Family, Strengthened by Holy Marriage, Pray for us.

~ Fr Jeremy M. Gries